Paralegal Spotlight: Mary Accardi

By Mary Accardi

I became a paralegal a few years ago, not as a recent college graduate nor as my first profession, but as someone looking for divine intervention.

My younger self was a stay-at-home mom until my divorce. At the time, I was determined to support myself, and against the advice of my attorney, did not ask for alimony. Maybe not a great idea in retrospect, but knowing myself, I would most likely do it again. I did not have a college degree and had not worked outside of my home in over ten years. I was lucky, though; I found a job in New York City working for an oil broker. Within a year, I was the Office Manager. When they decided to move to Miami, I handled the logistics of moving the office, the brokers, and their families, as well as mine. Being a single Mom in an unfamiliar city, five hundred miles from all that I knew, I was miserable; I missed my family and friends. I connected with someone that knew someone, and as luck would have it, found a job immediately back in Midtown Manhattan. Back then, you could make a decent living without a college education. It was a different time. However, internally, I frequently felt “less than.”

I raised my children basically mandating that they go to college. My only concern was that they choose a major that they felt some enthusiasm about. In my mind, at the time, the likelihood was that they would be doing it for a long time. Through experience and life, I now find that mindset is often a fallacy. If I have learned anything, it is that we must remain open to all the possibilities that we never even began to imagine.

I started taking college classes when my kids were in grammar school and continued throughout most of their young lives. When I moved to North Carolina, I knew that I would continue to take classes and that I had a passion for design. I enrolled in a program that was professionally recognized and pursued a degree in interior design. Because money is always an obstacle to be overcome, I worked part time in a furniture store and went to school part time. And then, quite suddenly, my Dad died.

My Dad’s death rocked me to my core. It made me stop and think about how short life is and I knew right then that I needed to decide – was I going to school piecemeal for the rest of my life? Was I going to continue to feel “less than”? No! I chose not to waste another minute; I went all in.

After conferring with my significant other, I went full time and graduated cum laude from Meredith College with a Bachelor of Science. Life was good. And then, it wasn’t. My significant other had a heart attack while we were on vacation in Italy. That was a nightmare. After losing him, I found myself floundering, but I held on to my family, especially my only sister. I bounced around for a bit, and after many conversations, planned on moving back up north and staying with her until I figured out my next step. And then it happened. Again. My world was rocked in a way that I never expected. This time, my sister, who also happened to be my best friend in life, was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Her death crumbled the very foundation of my life. I no longer found joy in much of anything, but not being financially solvent, I knew I needed to work.

So, I prayed for divine intervention.

I had always done administrative work and thought that would be the place to start looking. As I started to peruse available positions, I noticed an ad for a paralegal. My sister was a paralegal before it was even a named profession. At last, this may be a direction (first intervention). I knew it would require specific courses, and a quick google search led me to my alma mater – Meredith College (second intervention). I filled out the form to get more information, and within an hour, they replied that they would be holding an information session the following Tuesday; this was Thursday evening (third intervention).

I went to the session where the director of the program started explaining the “soft skills” that would be required. As she listed them, I began to tick them off in my head saying, check, check, check, (another intervention, perhaps?). Okay. Still not totally convinced, I scheduled a meeting with the Director. She believed that this may be a good fit, and I would not be wasting my time (or theirs), or the money. Not wanting to wait any longer because I now had a direction, I needed all the paperwork completed in two days if I wanted to enroll for January. As the saying goes, “where there is a will, there is always a way.” I submitted my paperwork and was accepted to the program.

Being the oldest in the class can be (unbelievably) intimidating but also invigorating. I would not be deterred. I loved every minute of the program. My instructors, who varied from paralegals working in diverse areas of law, to practicing attorneys, to a sitting Judge, may have found my enthusiasm a bit much. In retrospect, I know that I was that annoying student that questioned the “why” of everything but was (and still am) most appreciative of their patience.

My interest was in litigation, perhaps voting rights, or immigration. The universe obviously had different plans. I found a temporary position in a small family law firm that transitioned into a full-time position.  During that time, I learned all I could, studied for the North Carolina Paralegal Certification, and passed. Wanting to keep all my options open, I began to study for NALA’s (National Association of Legal Assistants) certification.  When the firm I was working for started to cut my hours, I began looking for another position. I was fortunate to find a part-time position with Campbell Law School in the Senior Law Clinic. Oh, I passed the first part of NALA’s certification (their exam is given in two parts and you must pass the first to be eligible for the second). There was no conflict of interest, so I was able to work at both places until the pandemic. Right before I started at Campbell, I received word that I passed the second part of NALA’s certification. Now I could add “CP” and “NCCP” after my name.

Last July, my (amazing) boss told me that he would be retiring and did not know what would happen with the clinic. Unfortunately, the Senior Law Clinic will be closing in July. Perhaps another intervention was that the law school would be opening a Family Law Clinic. Again, I was fortunate that the school enabled me to study for and receive an Advanced Paralegal Certification in Family Law.

Now, is any of this remotely interesting? Not really. Is it relevant to our profession? Hardly, not in any technical sense anyway, but perhaps in a personal one. Life continues to throw curveballs (or lemons).  Mixed metaphors aside, I genuinely believe that the responsibility we owe to ourselves, and to the world, is to find the perseverance, persistence, and wherewithal to keep getting up to bat, or to make delicious lemonade, whichever metaphor suits your fancy.

Regardless of life’s trials and tribulations, if we choose to remain open, we will keep evolving. If we choose to follow the ever-twisting and turning path, we may end up in places that we never even imagined.

Here is what I do know for sure: the people we love affect our lives in unexpected ways, and perhaps, with divine intervention and perseverance, we move closer to becoming the best version of who we were always meant to be.

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