Clarence Thomas Mysteriously Absent From Supreme Court Session -- Let The Zany Speculation Begin!

Clarence Thomas made like a massive financial gift on his annual disclosure forms and just didn't show up.

President Bush Speals At Federalist Society’s Gala

(Photo by Aude Guerrucci-Pool/Getty Images)

Clarence Thomas failed to show up to this morning’s Supreme Court session, depriving the advocates of any questions that he would inevitably not ask anyway. It’s a shame, because Thomas missed out on Snyder v. U.S., a case about whether or not it’s bribery to funnel  payments to an official “in recognition of actions a state or local official has already taken or committed to take, without any quid pro quo agreement to take those actions.” Just seems like a subject Thomas might have thoughts on, that’s all.

According to CNN, the Supreme Court did not respond to a request for additional information about Thomas’s whereabouts.

The most obvious excuse would be an illness. That was the basis of his past absences. Though if the justice has the sniffles, one would expect the Court to just go ahead and say so in order to tamp down on reckless speculation — already seeping onto social media — that Biden is going to end up making a Supreme Court nomination this year.

And while it’s possible that Thomas skipped out on his job because he couldn’t find parking — he does drive an RV financed by a rich health care executive and those are a bear to back into a slot — let’s go ahead and assume that’s not the case. Perhaps he had to do a little testifying of his own this morning in the probe into an unnamed judge’s illegal financial disclosure omissions that we’re all pretty positive is him.

Maybe most plausibly, he took a look at a case about whether or not it should be a crime to give an official money for past actions in a world where ProPublica has tagged the justice with telling GOP lawmakers to make sure the justices get more money or one or more of the reliable ones — like you know who — might quit and then he suddenly started getting all kinds of gifts that he refused to disclose and thought… yeah I don’t want my name hitched to this case.

Though if he’d recused himself formally the Court would have to disclose that because the Supreme Court’s SUPER DUPER NEW ETHICS CODE requires the justices to disclose why they’ve recused themselves. And it’s not like one of the justices would just ignore that basic standard of ethical behavior.

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Ahem!

On the other hand, maybe Thomas lacks Alito’s brazenness for flouting the newly adopted, entirely toothless rule and decided that he didn’t want to have to explain bailing on a political corruption case that hit a little close to home so he just took a sick day instead. Has anyone seen Clarence, Ginni, and Harlan Crow zipping around Chicago in a 1961 Ferrari 250 GT California Spyder today?

Or maybe he just realized this morning that he’d forgotten to fill out his taxes and started scrambling. Do you count a megadonor giving your mom free rent as income? Asking for a friend.

Clarence Thomas misses Supreme Court arguments without explanation [CNN]

Earlier: Clarence Thomas Thinks He Was Practically Forced To Take All That Under The Table Money
Clarence Thomas RV Financed By Rich Health Care Executive In Least Shocking Development Ever
Judicial Conference Probes Ethical Breaches Of Unnamed Judge… But It’s Almost Certainly Clarence Thomas
Paragon Of Virtue Clarence Thomas Has Been Given Half Million In Value Off The Record And It Totally Hasn’t Impacted His Judging. Not One Bit. Nope.

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HeadshotJoe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news. Joe also serves as a Managing Director at RPN Executive Search.