Nothing Is A Better Distraction From A Nakedly Political Court Than A Totally Important Game Of Whodunit

'We only call balls and strikes. Unless our team is losing. Then it’s hockey and we start punching.'

Leaked Report Indicates Supreme Court Set To Overturn Roe v. Wade

(Photo by Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images)

Given that right-wing news sources seem to be more focused on the fact of the Alito leak rather than its alley-oops knocking down interracial marriage, contraception use and purchase, the overturning of Brown v. Board and the like, I, too, will follow suit. They’re in power and have decided to just do what they want — I figure I’ll participate in what is very clearly not just them using jazz hands to distract us from the fact that this coming generation of Americans may well have fewer rights than their parents. I’m going to need some line of articles to point to to establishing good social credit once they take over free speech mediums, Musk buying Twitter and all.

So who did it? Who leaked the precious Glengarry overturn? In the immediate hubbub to be the first on pointing blame, Zodiac tried to pin it on a lefty because reasons and Grant Stinchfield tried to pin it on KBJ. I know she’s super qualified and talented, but even I believe she has limits. What I do know is this: There is gonna a lot of Mr. Meeseeks-level blame shifting until somebody fesses up to this, because the right isn’t in the clear yet either.

[Nina] Totenberg said on ABC’s “This Week” that the prevailing theory is that a conservative clerk released the decision in an attempt to lock in the five justices who voted to support overturning Roe as Chief Justice John Roberts reportedly attempts to pull his colleagues toward a more moderate position.

“That has never, ever occurred before,” Totenberg said of the leak. “That could only, in all likelihood, have come from a justice — that I think is less likely — or perhaps one of the clerks.”

“The only one that makes sense is it came from somebody who was afraid that this majority might not hold,” she added.

I don’t know who leaked it, but I hope it was someone on the right just so I can see the Simone Biles level of flip-flopping that will result from the revelation. Just kidding. They’ll likely just continue to ignore the results of the investigation if the results doesn’t fit in to the playbook. Because that’s what this is. And much like the people of Troy, the hope is that you focus on the pretty horsey and not the serious threat to stare decisis, privacy, and the sanctity of the rule of law that it dissimulates.

NPR Reporter Says ‘Leading Theory’ On SCOTUS Leak Is Conservative Clerk [The Hill]


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Chris Williams became a social media manager and assistant editor for Above the Law in June 2021. Prior to joining the staff, he moonlighted as a minor Memelord™ in the Facebook group Law School Memes for Edgy T14s.  He endured Missouri long enough to graduate from Washington University in St. Louis School of Law. He is a former boatbuilder who cannot swim, a published author on critical race theory, philosophy, and humor, and has a love for cycling that occasionally annoys his peers. You can reach him by email at cwilliams@abovethelaw.com and by tweet at @WritesForRent.

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